Deanery 1 sponsors a Marriage Preparation program within the Diocese. The following links are their brochure:

• 2010-2011 Marriage Preparation Booklet

Catholic Engaged Encounter
A Wedding is a Day, A Marriage is a Lifetime!
For info: (306) 763-1256 or www.engagedencounter.org
This weekend would make a perfect wedding or shower gift from caring relatives or friends

A booklet, "Marriage in Christ" (June 2000), outlines the Marriage Guidelines for weddings in the Diocese of Prince Albert. The booklet is especially helpful for young adults, engaged couples and their parents, and priests and laypersons involved in marriage preparation. 

"Marriage in Christ" includes suggested Scripture readings and is available at parishes or from the Diocesan Pastoral Centre for $3.  Following are excerpts from the booklet.

Marriage as Sacrament
The essential element of the Sacrament of Marriage is the baptized man's and woman's mutual and irrevocable consent to be united as married partners for life in a way which fosters their welfare as individuals and their union as a couple, and is open to giving life to and nurturing children.

To enter such a relationship permanently, one must be free to do so -- psychologically, emotionally, and physically. Mutual consent is at the heart of marriage itself and of marriage as a sacrament. Both individuals must know themselves and each other well enough to make an exclusive commitment that they can keep...in joy and in sorrow, in good times and in bad, until death.

-p. 3 (from "Loving: A Catholic Perspective on Vocational Lifestyle Choices" by Michelle McCarthy)

The Unity and Indissolubility of Marriage
Conjugal love...demands indissolubility and faithfulness in definitive mutual giving; and it is open to fertility.

- p. 4 (Catechism of the Catholic Church, no. 1643)

The unity of marriage, distinctly recognized by our Lord, is made clear in the equal personal dignity which must be accorded to man and wife in mutual and unreserved affection.

- p. 4 (Catechism, no. 1645)

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The Fidelity of Conjugal Love

The most important reason for fidelity is found in God's fidelity to his covenant: the union of Christ with his Church is insoluble. Through the sacrament of Matrimony the spouses are enabled to represent this fidelity and witness to it.

- p. 4 (Catechism, no. 1646-1647)

Openness to Fertility

The matrimonial covenant...is by its nature ordered toward the good of the spouses and the procreation and education of offspring.

- p. 2 (Catechism, no. 1604)

Children are the supreme gift of marriage and contribute greatly to the good of the parents themselves.

- p. 4 (Catechism, no. 1652)

Parents are the principal and first educators of their children. In this sense, the fundamental task of marriage and family is to be at the service of life.

- p. 5 (Catechism, no. 1653)

Spouses to whom God has not granted children can nevertheless have a conjugal life full of meaning, in both human and Christian terms. Their marriage can radiate a fruitfulness of charity, of hospitality and of sacrifice.

- p. 5 (Catechism, no. 1654)

Reasons for a Church Wedding

In the Catholic Church marriage is a sacrament. A sacrament is an encounter with God; the sacrament of marriage is God's encounter with you, the couple, and the celebration of God's presence in the midst of the assembly -- the family and friends who have come to celebrate with you.Sacraments are never private affairs; they are public celebrations of the love of God for his people. The sacrament of marriage is not just the union of two people; it is also a reverencing of the Christian life, that is, of what it means to
follow Jesus Christ.

- p. 6 (from "When Love is Found" by Jeanne Cotter and David Haas, pp. 2-3)

We ask you to reflect on the following questions in order to help you prepare yourselves better for this most important day of your life. Try to answer them together honestly.

The Church cherishes this vocation of marriage and therefore wants to protect it by helping the couple prepare for it the best way possible.

Couples who are to be married in the Diocese of Prince Albert are obliged to take part in a process of marriage preparation (Engaged Encounter weekend, Marriage Preparation program, pre-marriage inventory and counselling
resources such as "Enrich", or prescribed reading, videos, question-and-answer workbooks to be discussed with their pastor.

There should be preferably four months of preparation prior to the marriage following the initial contact with the parish priest or the person delegated to perform marriages in that parish. These activities are offered to the couples as tools to help them understand each other more fully, to develop richer communication between them and to give the couple a clearer understanding of the meaning of Christian marriage. (p. 7)                                                                                       

Cohabitation
­ One should not marry because one is expected to or feels obliged to do so. Marriage must be a truly free choice if it is to be a marriage at all. Living together may not allow either person enough emotional distance and objectivity to make this extremely important life decision.

- Catholic teaching opposes cohabitation before marriage, but it also strongly supports a couple's right to marry. It opposes cohabitation only because it supports sexuality and marriage as sacred and wants couples to achieve
marital success and happiness.

- While the Church wants to support the couple and their relationship, it also adheres to religious values that the couple seems to be denying by their choice to live together before marriage. In other words, the couple seems to
say that they do not think as the Church does but yet are coming to celebrate something for which the Church stands. As adults we must take responsibility for actions which have specific consequences.

- The following are questions to consider. They are not hard-and-fast rules. If you have been living together, but have a deep desire to prepare your hearts for the full grace in the sacrament of marriage, ask yourselves the following:

1. How will marriage be different from our present situation?
2. What will it change in terms of marriage as a sacrament in terms of the marital bond and commitment?
3. Are you willing to separate and to attempt to the best of your ability to live a chaste life as a single person until your wedding day?
4. Would you be prepared to delay the marriage a little to deepen the meaning of marriage for yourselves?
5. Would you accept to have a more private ceremony with the immediate family present instead of a big wedding?    (p. 8)

Planning the Wedding

1. Visit the pastor of the parish in which you are presently living or to which you belong at least six months prior to your intended date of marriage.
2. Allow three to six months for processing the legal forms required for marriage in the Roman Catholic Church.
3. Dispensation from the Chancery Office in Prince Albert is required for a marriage between a Catholic and a non-Catholic. Your pastor or the delegated person in the parish will go through these forms with you.
4. Couples wishing to marry in Saskatchewan must provide a Saskatchewan marriage license to the officiating clergy or marriage commissioner. Marriage licenses can be obtained at most jewelers.
5. Music should be selected with the help of your parish music ministry preferably two months prior to the wedding. All music must follow the guidelines set by the Diocese of Prince Albert. Choose from the hymnal currently used in the parish.
6. Selecting the readings and contacting lectors should be done preferably two months prior to the wedding. Lists of suitable readings are found at the back of "Marriage in Christ."    (p. 9)

Wedding Location The proper and usual place for celebrating marriages is a church or chapel. Weddings held outdoors are not allowed. Marriage is a celebration of faith and so is to be celebrated in a place where the Christian community normally gathers to celebrate its faith.  (p. 10)

Mixed Marriages
The Catholic Church recognizes that marriages of non-Catholics are valid. A non-Catholic person cannot re-marry in the Catholic Church without obtaining an annulment. (p. 10)

Planning the Liturgy
All liturgical celebrations, regardless of the occasion or those present, are worship, the prayer of the entire church. The wedding liturgy is never to be seen as simply an event or a "show for the bride and groom", with family and   friends attending as if they were an audience.

The better prepared you are, the less stressful things will be as you get closer to the celebration. Do not wait until the last minute!  (p. 10)

The church community prays that both the preparation and celebration of your wedding will bring you closer to each other and to God, and that it will enrich your life and the lives of those who share your joy.

- p. 10 (from Cotter and Haas, pp. 4-5)

When choosing liturgical ministers (readers, etc.) please choose them on the basis of gifts people have so that each minister can truly help the community in this particular time of worship. For example, when you choose a lector, ask   someone who reads regularly in his/her parish. Also, in selecting who will be the musicians/singer for your wedding, consider asking someone who is a music minister in a parish. (p. 11)

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Guidelines for the Wedding Liturgy

Procession: 
The Ritual for Marriage cites two options for the entrance procession.

First Option: The priest vests as for Mass and goes in procession to the main door of the church. There he greets the couple in a warm and friendly way; he  shows them that the Church is rejoicing with them on their day. Then all go to the altar in one procession: the ministers (including servers) lead, carrying the cross and lectionary, then the priest and the attendants, the parents and the couple.

Second Option: The priest and ministers go in procession to the altar as usual. Once they are in place the attendants, parents and couple come in procession. The priest greets the couple from his place (or the words of welcome are
omitted and the mass or liturgy of the Word begins at once).   (p. 11)

No other format is provided in the present rite.

(The custom of having the groom at the front of the church while the bride is led separately to the altar) should be discouraged as much as possible by pastors, since it places undue emphasis on the entrance and on the bride.

- p. 12 (from Marriage: Ritual and Pastoral Notes, CCCB)

Scripture Readings:
Whether there is a mass or not, there are always readings from Scripture at a wedding in the Catholic Church.

The proclamation of the Scripture texts at a wedding, or at any rite, is an important work. It should be entrusted to people who believe in Christ, who are capable of proclaiming in such a way that all may hear God's word, and who
will make an effort to prepare. Think carefully about who will be invited to take part in the proclamation of the Scriptures.

The Scriptures are proclaimed from the Lectionary. It is beneath the dignity of God's word to be read from a photocopied page, or from a booklet.  ( p. 13)

Vows:
The couple may compose their own vows but they must be approved by the pastor since it is necessary that the words chosen indicate that all other persons are excluded from intimacy, and that the union they are now entering is intended
to last until God calls one of them in death.

Catholic marriage vows do not speak of obedience of a wife to her husband; indeed, such unilaterial subjugation has not been found for years, if ever, in the rite of Catholic marriage in Canada. Mutual and love-filled acceptance of one
another as equals, with both persons subject to God, is the spirit of these vows.  (p. 13)

Signing of the Marriage Papers:
Since the signing of the marriage papers is not a liturgical act but rather a civil requirement, it takes place after the closing prayer and final blessing. It is therefore recommended that this action does not happen at the altar but rather
on a side table appropriate for this action.  (p. 14)

Photography:
Photographs that are taken discreetly and that do not interrupt the flow of the liturgy are not offensive. Professional photographers should pride themselves on their ability to be unobstructive. More troubling are amateur photographers who appear out of nowhere and destroy the impact of the most solemn moments. Couples and families should make it known among their friends that such behavior is not acceptable. An announcement by the pastor and/or music minister prior to the ceremony would be appropriate.  (p. 14)

Music for Weddings
The Second Vatican Council has pointed out that the words being sung must
always be in harmony with Catholic beliefs. The texts should come mainly from Scripture and from liturgical sources.

It is the Church assembly who worships at a wedding, which is a celebration of the believing community expressing its faith, and worship of the universal church.

A wedding is not a private or family affair. The selection, arrangement and execution of all the music must respect the right of the assembly to participate fully in the celebration.

The music chosen for the wedding liturgy should be familiar to the people of the church where the celebration takes place. If the music is mostly new, or beyond the ability of the local congregation, it will limit their participation, and thus hamper the community's worship.

Sacred and Secular: Many songs mention "love". We must ask what is meant by "love" in a song before choosing it. Songs which express the religious dimension of love explicitly, of course, have pride of choice. Songs which imply this religious dimension are also suitable. But a song which denies this dimension either explicity or implicitly must be avoided at all costs, for it belies the mystery: it is a falsehood in liturgy.

Music at a wedding is a ministry, and as such we want it to help worship God and lead the assembly in prayer. Take time to consult someone from your parish music ministry to help you in your selection of liturgical music. While there are a great number of beautiful love songs, the songs for a wedding should have words which express God's love made present in our lives. (p. 16)

Hymns and instrumental music chosen for marriage celebrations should respect the purpose of the particular moments in the liturgy which the music is meant to serve. Hymns are sung prayers, and are addressed to God, not the couple.
Music for a wedding is to be an expression of Christian worship. Secular music (love songs from the hit parade) has no place in Catholic liturgy. Love songs significant for a couple need not be used in the liturgy but at some other time
during the wedding day, such as during the reception or at the banquet.

Cantor: The renewed Catholic liturgy promotes the role of the cantor or psalmist, a minister who leads the assembled worshippers in singing the responsorial psalm and in the Gospel acclamation. Our tradition does not encourage the use of a soloist at other parts of the wedding liturgy.

Singing Groups:  Groups or choirs who sing at weddings are to be aware of the difference between singing at worship and singing on the stage.

On the stage, the musicians and singers dominate the action, and an audience follow their words, rhythm and actions. They and their music are at the centre of what is happening; they are what is happening.

In liturgy, however, the musicians are ministers, servants. Their role is subservient to the worship of the community and should help the people to give God greater praise. The ministers of music are there to intensify the spirit of prayer and worship, not to entertain the people. Their music is to fit into the mood and action of the various parts of the rite, and is to help its progress.

Entrance Music:   May be either instrumental (organ, piano or different instruments) or it may be vocal. Guests will wish to witness the procession as it enters the church. It is unlikely that people can follow a hymn from a hymnal and follow the procession at the same time. It is more reasonable to let everyone enjoy the procession and begin the entrance hymn after the wedding party has arrived at the front of the church. The organ and/or other musical instrument will play throughout the procession.   (p. 17)

Eucharistic Acclamation:   The Holy, Holy, Holy Lord, the Memorial Acclamation and the Great Amen should be sung by all the people. A cantor's voice may lead the people in these acclamations, but the people should not be left out; these are their parts.

The Lord's Prayer:  This is everyone's prayer and should never be sung by only one person. If it is sung, use a setting everyone knows.

Communion: Because this is the time for sharing the Eucharist, hymn selections should relate to this action. The congregation should be invited to sing; antiphonal style music is preferred during communion, so that no one need carry a book in the communion procession.

Recessional:   It is strongly recommended that this selection be instrumental in nature rather than vocal.  (p. 18)

Marriage Guidelines provide consistency

The diocese's new Marriage Guidelines are meant to provide consistency for Catholic weddings here, says Lorraine Nyuli of Nipawin, a member of the diocesan commission for liturgy who helped draft the guidelines.

Without guidelines, "Your liturgy is slowly eroded with secular-type things that are brought in," Nyuli told priests, parish administrators and pastoral assistants at the pastoral ministry days in January. "We must show them there's something there that we value, that's important."

Nyuli said the "Marriage in Christ" booklet, with topics ranging from suitable music to outdoor weddings, should be explained early in the marriage preparation process to avoid disappointment by engaged couples or their families. The guidelines include a message from Bishop Blaise Morand saying the information "challenges those contemplating marriage to take some time out to seriously consider some very important topics having to do with marriage and weddings."

The booklet's first section outlines the church's teachings on marriage as sacrament, the unity, fidelity and indissolubility of marriage, and openness to fertility. In another part, the couple is asked to consider questions such as "How can we plan our church wedding to show that it is a celebration of faith?" and "How is our wedding celebration going to be an experience of prayer and transformation for our families and friends?"

A section on cohabitation reads, "One should not marry because one is expected to or feels obliged to do so. Marriage must be a truly free choice if it is to be a marriage at all. Living together may not allow either person enough emotional distance and objectivity to make this extremely important life decision." Engaged couples who are living together are asked to consider questions such as, "What will (marriage) change in terms of marriage as a sacrament, in terms of the marital bond and commitment?" and "Are you willing to separate and to attempt to the best of your ability to live a chaste life as a single person until your wedding day?"

The booklet clarifies that Catholic marriage vows "do not speak of obedience of a wife to her husband; indeed, such unilateral subjugation has not been found for years, if ever, in the rite of Catholic marriage in Canada. "Mutual and love-filled acceptance of one another as equals, with both persons subject to God, is the spirit of these vows."

The booklet also includes a suggested time-line for planning the wedding, liturgy planning sheets with or without eucharist, and suggested Scripture readings.

Nyuli suggested other ways parishes can support couples planning to marry: include prayers for engaged couples in the intentions, explain the marriage guidelines at a parish workshop, make copies of the booklet available for borrowing, and give engaged couples a Bible or the Catechism of the Catholic Church as a gift. "Every opportunity has to be taken to help couples grow in their faith and to keep God in their marriage," she said.

In Love for Life! is the name of a booklet published in 2002 by the Catholic Organization for Life and Family. It is a reflection paper on the conjugal, social and religious significance of marriage (44 pages, $9.95). Some of the questions addressed:

• What is so different about love in marriage?

• What is gained by getting married instead of just living together?

• In what way is being a couple of concern to others? to God?

• The booklet is also available in French and can be ordered from COLF at 1-800-769-1147 or E-mail publi@cccb.ca or write to 90 Parent Ave., Ottawa, K1N 7B1.